It may be the depths of winter now, but imagine the scene: having spent all day on the beach during a rare hot August Bank Holiday, a day-tripping family tidies up their detritus.

Nan is levered out of the deckchair and Dad bounces assiduously on the hissing inflatable banana until it slowly goes flaccid and is packed away. Struggling back up the hill, the whining kids, piebald with suncream, are famished from a long day of throwing sand at each other, and Mum’s thinking with little relish about the prospect of heating up tomato soup on the Camping Gaz stove. Just then, a fish and chip shop comes into view, the tempting aroma of hot oil wafting across the pavement and drawing the hapless tourists unresistingly inside.

If our hypothetical hungry family is in Ryde, they’d do well to stop at the first chippy near Appley beach, Monkton Village’s Chipmunks. Matt and Cat have reviewed that venue favourably, but it is only one of several contenders in the town. The family could maybe step a bit further west. No, no, not to the Codfather, slightly south west and up the hill to Wights. Although a tad more than a hop, skip and jump from the beach, this chippy is well-placed at the junction of Ryde’s precinct, near a pub, cinema and bingo hall - perfect for passing hot-snack-hunters. And so it was that Wights was Matt and Cat’s chosen venue for a fish and chip supper with a visiting relative from London.

Read more »

It is often said that the Isle of Wight is England in miniature.

With its castles, tube trains, Neolithic stone monument and Doveresque white cliffs, it’s easy to see why the comparison is made. But it’s not just topographically that the Island reflects the rest of England. Visitors and residents can also experience living history. Admittedly some of the county is almost on a par with the modern world but there are anachronistic pockets. Take Cranmore, for example. Residents of this semi-rural backwater enjoy a peaceful existence, living according to pre-war rules when the Town and Country Planning Act and free dental care were mere jottings on the back of Clem Attlee’s ration book.

Another time-tunnel can be found at Seaview. The village itself perpetuates a charmingly Blytonesque feel; with wholesome children spending their summers in ancestral cottages with Pater and Mummy, Hugo and Phyllida. And within this little corner of England can be found the very epitome of contextual solecism, the Northbank Hotel.

Read more »

Visit the website: http://www.northbankhotel.co.uk/

This is the second review from Matt and Cat's visit to London. See earlier review of Elliot's here.

Being a tourist in London can be exhausting; the endless slack-jawed pointing and over-stimulation can quickly deplete one's energy reserves. Some visitors burden themselves with supplies of squashed sarnies and emergency bananas but when travelling light - as Matt and Cat did - help is at hand with the resurgence of the coffee house. First hitting these shores in the seventeenth century, and reaching a peak of popularity in the 1950s, such venues continue to provide cheap, warm places for people to congregate and refresh themselves.

In the self-aware twenty-first century, Cliff Richard’s moody teen of Expresso Bongo is a distant memory (although remarkably Cliff is as sprightly as he was back in the day). In today's coffee bar, instead of a space-hungry jukebox, music insinuates its way out of a matchbook-size iPod Shuffle. In place of a well-thumbed copy of Kerouac’s ‘On the Road’, hipsters flick through virtual pages on their Kindles. Of course, some things prevail; people still engage in conversation, albeit with someone they’ve never met, on the other side of the world, through the medium of their wifi-enabled MacBook Air.

Read more »

Visit the website: http://www.prufrockcoffee.com

Although Matt and Cat have explored all corners of the Isle of Wight, they’re not particularly adventurous travellers otherwise.

Cat’s experiences of foreign parts are limited to various budget trips to European cities, eating frugal picnic lunches in public parks and worrying about running out of francs. Yes, her last foray abroad was before the introduction of the Euro. Matt actually left Europe once, but it was last millennium, and he has not shown any sign of wanting to repeat the experience.

Matt and Cat fantasise about visiting a city with style; swapping flophouses for luxury hotels, and giving up aimless blundering to enjoy a tour with a native guide. One day M&C’s wish was granted. It just so happened that they were offered the chance of a curated trip round some of London’s eateries with a knowledgeable sherpa, a chap who happened to own a fashionable London coffeehouse. Such an opportunity was not to be missed. With a fourth Island gastronaut in tow, they took an cockerel-startling early train to Waterloo, empty stomachs at the ready.

Read more »

Visit the website: http://www.elliotscafe.com

Come with us on a journey through time and space, to a land of long hot summers, Cinzano and pop charts where ‘Do You Wanna Touch’ was considered a tour de force.

A place where, if they weren’t having the neighbours round for fondue bourguignonne - dipping their meat to the vibrato warblings of Demis Roussos - your parents were eating out at a restaurant like Valentino’s.

Although a venerable feature of the Carisbrooke landscape, Valentino’s has never really appeared on Matt and Cat’s radar. They’ve eaten at the village’s other food venues: The Waverley, the Eight Bells and Cafe Number 44 but not the Italian restaurant. However, a prompting tweet from their virtual friend Englane, proclaiming that it was her favourite restaurant, inspired M&C to see what it was all about.

Read more »