Christmas comes but once a year, although the same cannot be said for Christmas dinners. Anyone who has a job, a family or friends will probably find themselves pulling a cracker with their colleagues and/or loved ones at more than one seasonal roast-fest. And so it was that Matt and Cat joined their fellow salt-miners for the first of several scheduled Christmas dinners.

After a pleasant walk around the beautiful West Wight, the group arrived at the Red Lion where they were met by Cat, who had the misfortune to be too crippled to manage the morning's gentle meander, the poor thing having twisted her ankle the previous day in an embarrassing tumble in Lidl's car park (oh the shame!).

Review continues:

Roast turkey

Most likely, the first thing any visitor to the Red Lion will notice is its picturesque setting. With the nearby historic All Saints Church and the winding road leading to the Causeway it could almost be a scene contrived by an artist of pastoral whimsy, an image worthy of a chocolate box (ok, fudge box as it's the Isle of Wight).

The second thing that you will notice, on entering the bar, is the list of rules pinned to the door - boozer beware! No children under ten are allowed in the bar although they are welcome to sit in the expansive garden. Also, there is a penalty for mobile phone usage; a shiny quid will have to be forfeited to the benefit of the RNLI for anyone who dares to break this golden rule: and yes, friends, this rule is rigorously enforced.

Once inside the homely interior, with its flagstone floor and exposed brickwork, you will undoubtedly encounter mine host. This exceptionally jolly fellow greeted Cat as she arrived in advance of the main party; genially chatting with her until her colleagues turned up.

Nut roast

Because the lunches had been pre-ordered and with the distraction provided by the welcome of the charming landlord, followed by the clattering arrival of her colleagues, Cat neglected to carry out one of the tasks of the restaurant reviewer. As regular readers will have noticed, most reviews on this site give typical extracts from a venue's menu. The trouble that Matt and Cat go to to remember this level of detail usually involves covert photography and a mental memory exercise worthy of the scouts. Alas, on this day, Cat took no notice whatsoever of the other dishes that were available. Perhaps her head was turned by the landlord's attentions. However, had she tried, she may have had no success, as the bill of fare changes so regularly that there was not even a printed menu to peruse. All of the grub is writ large on blackboards.

Seating themselves at the rustic wooden tables, Matt, Cat and associates did not have to wait long before their lunches were delivered. This is a notable thing in itself. Many pubs and even restaurants falter when faced with the undoubted challenge of producing a large number of Christmas dinners at once. The Red Lion was flawless. Unlike last year's leaden service at both the Buddle and Joe's, Newport, the Red Lion scored very highly for speed, courtesy and accuracy of service.

Matt - traditional son of a gun that he is - had the turkey. It was hot, plentiful and tasty. He declared it to be good, with a decent selection of light and dark meat. Having expected something pretty generic, he was very pleasantly surprised, particularly with the smooth bread sauce and accompanying vegetables.

Vegetables

Cat, too, did not have high hopes for her vegetarian nut roast but, wow, she was proved Very Wrong. Previous miserable experiences elsewhere have led her to compare nut roast unfavourably to a pile of dried bird seed, with no flavour other than the salty sputum coughed up whilst trying to choke down the arid lumps. Thankfully the nut roast at the Red Lion was superb. By cleverly adding apricots and currants to the mix, the roast was guaranteed to remain very moist and slightly sweet. It was most flavoursome, containing a good amount of garlic and topped with a disc of goats cheese with, on the side, mushrooms in a creamy sauce to help it all go down smoothly.

The turkey was served with roast potatoes and the nut roast with new. There were plenty of seasonal vegetables to go round; broccoli, sprouts and swede so puréed that it was almost liquid. The friendly staff several times passed by and offered more of any of these extras to those who wanted it.

Fruit crumble

The walkers had built up an appetite. After doing justice to the decent first course they were pleased to see the warming fruit crumble. Cat - who had only expended the energy needed to drive to the venue - still managed to force down the delicious pudding. She was particularly taken with the creaminess of the vanilla ice-cream, which can sometimes be almost dry and gritty. Not at the Red Lion.

To rectify some minor confusion at the ordering stage, jugs of cream and custard were brought out for those who had mistakenly ordered unaccompanied crumble. A typically accommodating touch.

So, pretty good all round then. This is a really old-fashioned, unreformed and unrefurbished pub, that nonetheless manages to excel in both food and atmosphere. A warm welcome, excellent food, prompt and attentive service for a crowd of Christmas revellers. How can this be anything other than 'We Love'?