Going to Totland Bay at midsummer must be like going to the moon. Matt and Cat blasted off from Newport and headed in a near-straight trajectory. Reaching jowl-bothering speeds of nearly 40mph (except through Shalfleet), they went west towards the setting sun. The light from our brightest star was dazzling and, to preserve their rheumy old retinas, the astronautical pioneers lowered the sun visors on the vintage BMW. Once they could go no further, they parked up and gawped at Dorset.

Finding themselves far from the metropolitan hustle and bustle, M and C had switched to holiday mode the moment that they crossed Yarmouth bridge. It was a particularly pleasant evening; the clouds scudded across the sun in a very picturesque way, a boy played with his dog on the sandy beach and gulls pecked at random stuff. As the Waterfront was the only venue around, Matt and Cat went in...

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Visit the website: http://www.thewaterfront-iow.co.uk

What glorious weather the Isle of Wight enjoyed in early June! Good job too, as otherwise the music festival would have been a wash-out and Seaclose Park remodelled as a quagmire to rival last year's Bestival mudbath.

Making the most of the sunshine, M and C put on their paddling clogs and tippytoed at the Appley beach's water's edge, cooling their bunions in the limpid waters of the Solent. They interrupted this recreation for a cream tea at Puckpool Tea Gardens, eating their scones under a shady vine.

The leisurely day continued with dinner at Olivo, the new kid on Union Street's block. Situated in what was historically the old post office, the building's previous incumbent was the ambitious Smithfields. Alas, that restaurant closed for reasons not known to Matt and Cat, although they hypothesise that maybe the carrying capacity of Union Street for big, vaguely Mediterranean eateries had been exceeded. Or perhaps it was just too large a building to sustainably maintain. For whatever reason, it would be a brave or confident business that would take on such a vast venue. Now, one such has stepped forward. Does Olivo have what it takes?

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In a special guest review, Matt & Cat regular Wendy reviews food at the Isle of Wight Festival.

I wrote about IW Festival food for M&C last year and am pleased to bring you this update for 2009.

Sunday morning:
Keeping my eyes peeled for Isle of Wight food vendors in amongst the countless concessions, the only additional one I've spotted is Yarmouth-based Harbour Seafoods in the big food area near the main stage. After their low-key début at last year's Festival they're now geared up for catering big events, with a large kitchen, and bold signage promising seafood chowder, paella and kebabs. They were doing great trade. Might check it out today.

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Trying their hardest not to go to Olivo in Ryde until it had been open a couple of weeks, Matt and Cat had to assuage their desire for Italian food by heading to Shanklin's Pavarotti's.

It was about time the reviewing duo went to this well-established restaurant; previous attempts had seen Matt and Cat thwarted by the venue's popularity. However, Cat phoned ahead and was assured that a table would be available - and by arriving just after 6.30pm on a Monday they made sure they wouldn't be gazumped by the holiday-makers in this popular tourist area.

Pavarotti's is an established business in the Old Village and it sits well alongside the gifte shoppes. In fact, so confident have its owners been of its long-lasting appeal that the vast front window is a stained glass tribute to Luciano Pavarotti himself, instantly recognisable from his outstretched arms, one hand clutching his trademark white handkerchief and with his, er... stunted little legs (the window artisan must have run out of leg room). Certainly this shop could never be mistaken for any other with that prominent and iconic branding. Matt and Cat pondered the permanence of the window. Cat eventually decided that, in the year 2020 the restaurant could be turned into a poundsaver-type shop, when it would be called Tenner (tenor) World!! But enough of the dismal puns, what was the food like?

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There are a few things about living on the Isle of Wight so axiomatic that Island residents will be bemused to even hear them discussed. Taxis are one. You never, ever take a taxi on the Island unless someone else is paying. As everyone knows, they are fearfully expensive and inefficient. Well, to be fair they may or may not be expensive and inefficient, but as nobody who lives here has ever been in one it's hard to say. Quite possibly the Island has the world's best value taxi firms, but we'd never find out. Isle of Wight Pearl is another. Wildly popular with coach parties, this mysterious building is terra incognita to Islanders. It could be the finest entertainment on earth - or not. We have no idea what goes on in there or why.

So, what else? Food on the ferries. Ah, yes. From early childhood, Island children are told 'No, you can't have any sweets/drinks/cakes/chips etc' as a regular part of their trips on the ferry. This stricture carries on into adulthood. Snacks, maybe, but few Islanders will willingly eat a full meal on the ferry, on the assumption, passed down from father to son, that the food will be of such extraordinarily high price and low quality that the experience might prove fatal.

Recently, Matt and junior reviewers Bill and Jack found themselves travelling homewards with some friends. It came about that the party were eventually in the position of having to put ferry fodder to the test. A long drive back was delayed to such an extent that the only chance of getting on the boat in a timely fashion was to eat dinner on board. Various increasingly unlikely scenarios were devised to attempt to avoid this, but the practicality of arranging pizza delivery in the marshalling-yard having defeated them, Matt and party finally bowed to the inevitable and prepared to be fleeced. Did Red Funnel rise to the occasion, or did the shipboard supper sink without a trace? Read on to find out.

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Visit the website: http://redfunnel.co.uk